[1:32]*** Paul2 is now known as Rover
[1:32]* Rover barks
[1:32]<Death> Hi rover.
[1:32]<ag> ahhh...
[1:32]* Paul pats Rover
[1:32]* God can't cope
[1:32]* legion slaps legion around a bit with a large trout
[1:32]* Spot bites rover
[1:32]<legion> Ooops...
[1:32]* Rover bites Legion's arm
[1:33]* Death laughs at legion
[1:33]* Paul does too :)
[1:33]* legion slaps paul around a bit with a large trout
[1:33]* ag WORKS
[1:33]* Spot barks
[1:33]* Death slaps legion around a bit with a large trout
[1:33]<ag> probably
[1:33]* legion 's arm bleeds
[1:33]* Rover slaps legion and paul about with a large kipper
[1:33]<Death> Stoppit damnit
[1:33]* God tunrs the volume up
[1:33]* Paul ducks
[1:33]<Death> Have fun ag.
[1:33]* Spot bites Ducks
[1:33]<Death> Bad spot.
[1:33]<ag> hmmm
[1:33]* Rover runs around a tree
[1:33]<Death> NAughty.
[1:33]* Rover sniffs spot
[1:33]* Spot sniffs Rover's bum
[1:33]* Rover growls at spot
[1:33]* Spot fucks Rover
[1:33]<Death> Anyone for Sparky? (South parks joke)
[1:34]* Rover runs away
[1:34]* legion arrests spot...
[1:34]* Spot fucks legion's leg
[1:34]* legion puts spot down...
[1:34]* Rover gnaws on a bone
[1:34]* God resurrects spot
[1:34]* Spot nicks Rovers bone
[1:34]* Paul lets Rover off of his leash
[1:34]* legion goes to bed...
[1:34]* Spot bites legion
[1:34]* Rover is a rottweiler
[1:34]*** Spot was kicked by Death (Too many hormones.)
[1:35]<Death> Got it at last. :)
[1:35]* God lol
[1:35]* Paul wonders where spot is
[1:35]* Rover does too
[1:35]<Socks> No fun, Satan has gone to bed, so Spot can't come back
[1:35]* Rover wants revenge
[1:35]<Death> Sorry.
[1:35]* Rover is still here though
[1:36]*** Alastair (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[1:36]* Rover barks
[1:36]*** Rover was kicked by Socks (Socks.)
[1:36]*** Rover (~paul@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[1:36]*** Alastair is now known as Spot-subs
[1:36]<Spot-subs> Woof?
[1:36]* Rover chases Spot-subs
[1:37]* Spot-subs runs away keeping just ahead.
[1:37]* Rover spits at Spot
[1:37]* Rover hits
[1:37]* God hits Rover
[1:37]* Spot-subs drops opens his bowels straight into Rovers path
[1:37]* Rover bites God's foot
[1:37]* Rover sniffs Spot's crap
[1:37]* Rover turns away
[1:38]* Spot-subs knew that curry for dinner was a good move
[1:38]* Rover bites God's CPU fan
[1:38]<God> Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[1:38]* Rover bites God's CPU
[1:38]<Rincewind> right, I'm going again. biam
[1:38]* God batters Rover with a baseball bat
[1:38]*** Rincewind has quit IRC (Leaving.)
[1:39]* Spot-subs thinks he might leave while Rover is distracted.
[1:39]* Rover barks
[1:40]* Spot-subs barks louder.
[1:40]* God clobbers Rover again
[1:40]* Rover bites God's ear off
[1:40]* Paul ops NOW
[1:40]*** God sets mode: +o Paul
[1:40]*** Rover was kicked by Paul (Bad Rover. Naughty Rover..)
[1:40]*** Rover (~paul@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[1:40]* Rover bites Paul
[1:40]* Spot-subs thinks ops for dogs is good
[1:40]*** God sets mode: +o Spot-subs
[1:41]* Rover wants ops too
[1:41]*** God sets mode: +o Rover
[1:42]*** Kami has quit IRC (Kami has no reason.)
[1:42]*** Spot-subs was kicked by Rover (Muhahahaha-erf.)
[1:42]*** Spot-subs (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[1:42]<Spot-subs> Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....
[1:42]* Rover scuffles around trying to find his bone
[1:43]* Rover growls at Spot-subs
[1:43]* Spot-subs suddenly changes form to that of a giant wolfman.
[1:43]* Socks miaows worriedly
[1:43]* Spot-subs is a werewolf
[1:43]* Spot-subs won't hurt socks
[1:43]* Rover isn't scared.
[1:43]* Spot-subs moves faster than most can follow and picks rover up by the scrap of his neck and holds him 8 feet from the ground.
[1:43]* Rover sets an army of rottweilers on Spot-subs
[1:43]* Socks likes Spot - whatever form he takes
[1:44]* Rover bites socks
[1:44]* Spot-subs watches the rottweilers cower in fear from Spot-subs
[1:44]* Rover bites spot
[1:44]* Spot-subs throws Rover away from socks.
[1:44]* Spot-subs throws his head back and howls
[1:44]* Socks launches himself at Rover's back where he digs his claws in. Hard.
[1:44]* Rover turns into a super-rottweiler and bites off spot's head
[1:45]*** Rincewind (~ridcully@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[1:45]* Death will not allow deaths
[1:45]* Rover bites rincewind
[1:45]* Socks scratches Rovers eyes out
[1:45]* Rincewind ops 1
[1:45]*** God sets mode: +o Rincewind
[1:45]* Spot-subs disappears and reappears almost immediately by Rover
[1:45]* Rover takes socks eyes as a replacement
[1:45]* Spot-subs grows long claws and slashes accross Rovers side.
[1:45]* Rover is wearing armour
[1:46]* Spot-subs gets a tin opener out.
[1:46]* Spot-subs removes Rover's armour
[1:46]* Rover craps all over spot-subs
[1:46]<Paul> :-)
[1:46]* Socks finds the weak link and shreads Rover
[1:46]<Spot-subs> Rover can't reach high enough to do that.
[1:46]* Rover dies
[1:46]* Death will not allow deaths
[1:46]<Death> Rover is not dead.
[1:46]*** Rover was kicked by Socks (Go on then, die properly.)
[1:46]*** Rover (~paul@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[1:46]* Rover is, dammit
[1:46]*** Death sets mode: +b *!*@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk
[1:46]*** Grumpy sets mode: -b *!*@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk
[1:46]*** Rover is now known as Furball
[1:47]* Furball is a hamster
[1:47]*** Death sets mode: +b *!*@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk
[1:47]*** Grumpy sets mode: -b *!*@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk
[1:47]<God> Hmmm....
[1:47]* Socks eats Furball
[1:47]<Death> interesting
[1:47]<Socks> Yum yum
[1:47]* Rincewind thinks we need a #pets
[1:47]* Furball falls out of socks arse in a crap
[1:47]*** Grumpy has quit IRC (Killed (God (Piss off)).)
[1:47]<Death> why does it ban *!*@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk when I tell it to ban Furball
[1:47]* Furball cleans himself
[1:47]<Death> :)
[1:47]* Socks was going to be semi automated like Spot once
[1:47]<Death> I forgot you could do that.
[1:48]<God> Hehe
[1:48]* Spot-subs is not automated
[1:48]*** Grumpy (grumpy@perelandra.magd.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[1:48]<Spot-subs> But I suppose the other one might be.
[1:48]<God> Didn't last long though
[1:48]<Socks> He come back though
[1:48]<Death> Kick/ban?
[1:48]* Furball runs around on his spinning wheel
[1:48]*** Grumpy sets mode: +o Grumpy
[1:48]<God> I can't ban him
[1:48]*** Death sets mode: -o Grumpy
[1:48]*** Grumpy sets mode: +o Grumpy
[1:48]<God> I could ask him politely to leave though....
[1:48]* Furball flies through the air as he loses his footing
[1:48]<Death> :)
[1:48]* Paul catches furball
[1:48]* Furball thanks Paul
[1:49]* Furball scampers around Death's kitchen
[1:49]<God> Bugger. No I can't 'cos he's igoring me
[1:49]* Socks taps Furball left and right with his paws
[1:49]* Furball nibbles some of Death's bread
[1:49]* Furball hisses at Socks
[1:49]* Death thinks that his bread was furrier than furball.
[1:49]* Furball runs away
[1:50]* Furball liked it
[1:50]* Socks arches his back and hisses back
[1:50]* Furball scuttles down under the sink
[1:50]* Paul empties the sink
[1:50]* Furball gets wet
[1:50]* Paul dries furball
[1:51]* Furball is all frizzy
[1:51]* Socks waits patiently beside the sink for furball to come out
[1:51]* Paul puts Socks out of the house and puts furball back in his cage
[1:51]* God strikes Socks with a lightning bolt
[1:51]* Socks survives (9 lives)
[1:51]* Furball escapes from his cage while Paul isn't in X-windows
[1:51]<Furball> Heheh
[1:51]<Death> ITYM 8 lives. :)
[1:52]* Paul returns to X-windows and notices Furball is missing
[1:52]<God> If only I could turn back time
[1:52]* Furball hides in a tty
[1:52]* Socks sits by the window and watches
[1:52]* Socks thinks God is playing kareokee
[1:52]<Socks> <sp>?
[1:52]<Furball> Karaoke HTH HAND :)
[1:52]* Socks sits by the window and watches
[1:52]* Furball is a clever hamster
[1:52]* Socks sits by the window and watches
[1:53]* Furball notices it is raining heavily
[1:53]* Socks pretends he doesn't care what is happening
[1:53]* Paul lets Socks back in and dries him
[1:53]* Socks purrs
[1:53]* Paul gives Socks a fish
[1:53]* Socks rubs his head against Paul's leg
[1:53]* Furball is jealous of socks
[1:53]* Socks purrs
[1:53]* Socks spots Furball
[1:53]* Paul can't feed furball while he's not in his cage
[1:53]* Socks purrs
[1:54]* Furball is hungry
[1:54]* Furball is VERY hungry
[1:54]* Socks is hungry too
[1:54]* Socks is hungry enough to eat a hampster
[1:54]* Paul feeds socks some Kit-e-Kat to save furball
[1:54]* Furball thinks that's cool
[1:54]* Paul does too
[1:54]* Socks pretends he doesn't like Kit-e-Kat
[1:54]* Rincewind wonders wheter satan is still up
[1:54]<God> OK
[1:55]* Furball scampers back into his cage and waits for lunch
[1:55]<Death> He went to bed a while back
[1:55]<Rincewind> ok
[1:55]* Paul has run out of food
[1:55]* Furball cries
[1:53]* Socks sits on the top of the cage and looks in
[1:55]<Furball> tissue
[1:55]<Furball> !tissue
[1:55]* Grumpy hands Furball a tissue
[1:55]* Paul goes down the road to buy some food for furball
[1:55]* Furball is scared
[1:55]* Socks sits on the top of the cage and looks in
[1:55]* Socks is hungry enough to eat a hampster
[1:55]* Furball hides under some hay
[1:55]* Socks sits on the top of the cage and looks in
[1:56]* God plays Version 2
[1:56]* Paul wlaks down the road
[1:56]* Furball wonders what wlaking is :)
[1:56]* Paul walks too
[1:56]* Socks sits on the top of the cage and looks in
[1:56]* God thinks paul must be pretty wet 'cos its bucketting. Remember
[1:56]* Socks purrs
[1:56]* Furball wonders if socks is pasting
[1:56]* Paul is
[1:56]* Socks has an up key
[1:56]* Paul runs
[1:56]* Socks sits on the top of the cage and looks in
[1:57]* Paul buys food
[1:57]<God> HINT: nobody shut the door of the cage...
[1:57]* Furball shuts it quickly
[1:57]<Furball> :)
[1:57]* Paul leaves the shop
[1:57]* Furball hopes Paul gets back soon
[1:57]* Socks trys to get his paw through the bar
[1:57]<Rincewind> right, just got move the computer back now. back in a mo
[1:57]*** Rincewind has quit IRC (Leaving.)
[1:57]* Paul runs home
[1:57]* Socks gets his paw stuck
[1:57]* Furball ducks
[1:57]* Furball laughs
[1:57]* Socks frees his paw
[1:57]* Socks sits on the top of the cage and looks in
[1:57]* Socks purrs hungrily
[1:58]* Paul opens the door and wonder why Socks has his paw stuck in the cage
[1:58]* Socks pretends he was never near the cage
[1:58]* Furball thinks Socks is in for it now :-)
[1:58]* Socks purrs
[1:58]* Socks rubs his head against Paul's leg
[1:58]* Socks purrs
[1:58]* twoflower wants to borrow Joe Satriani off vader
[1:58]* Paul send Socks outside for being a bad cat and trying to pretend he was good
[1:58]* Furball looks outside at the hail
[1:58]* Socks sits by the window and watches
[1:58]* Socks sulks
[1:59]* God aims another lightning bolt
[1:59]<Death> Does Joe Satriani mind being leant out?
[1:59]* Furball feels sorry for Socks
[1:59]* Socks curls up
[1:59]* twoflower does not care
[1:59]* Furball asks Paul to let Socks back in
[1:59]* Death likes cats and invites him into his house.
[1:59]* Socks licks his paws
[1:59]* Paul opens the back door
[1:59]<Death> (him=socks)
[1:59]* Socks goes to death's place
[1:59]* Socks has already been fed at Paul's
[2:00]* Death puts a nice bean bag in front of the roaring fire.
[2:00]* Paul considers giving the haddock he bought at the shop to furball
[2:00]* Socks purrs
[2:00]<Furball> yeeuggh
[2:00]* Furball doesn't like haddock :)
[2:00]* Socks returns to Paul's
[2:00]* Death puts his feet up and goes to sleep in the armchair by the fire.
[2:00]* Socks purrs
[2:00]* Socks rubs his head against Paul's leg
[2:00]* Paul has a wet leg now
[2:00]* Socks purrs
[2:00]* Socks rubs his head against Paul's leg
[2:00]* Paul feeds socks
[2:00]* Socks purrs
[2:00]* Socks goes to death's place
[2:01]* Furball does too
[2:01]* Socks sleeps in front of Death's fire
[2:01]* Death gets another bean bag
[2:01]* Socks purrs
[2:01]* Socks licks his paws
[2:01]* Paul falls asleep in the fire by the armchair :-)
[2:01]* Socks licks his side
[2:01]* Furball wonders if Paul is feeling a bit warm
[2:01]<Death> :)
[2:01]* Socks licks his paws and wipes them over his ears
[2:01]* Socks licks his side
[2:01]* Socks licks his testicles
[2:02]* Furball licks his paws and wipes them over his arse
[2:02]* Socks licks his side
[2:02]* Socks licks his testicles
[2:02]* Paul smells burning
[2:02]* Socks licks Death
[2:02]* Furball looks distastefully at Socks
[2:02]* Death isn't phased at all
[2:02]* Death is all bone anyway.
[2:02]* Socks licks Furball
[2:02]* Furball scampers over Death's shoulder
[2:02]* Furball wonders if Socks will eat him
[2:02]* Socks goes outside
[2:03]* Spot-subs who still looks like a 7 oot werewolf goes to Death's place and curls up by the fire.
[2:03]* Socks poos
[2:03]* Paul extinguishes himself
[2:03]<Spot-subs> I mean foot not oot
[2:03]* Socks tries to kick dirt over the poo
[2:03]* Socks fails
[2:03]* Furball was under the poo
[2:03]* Socks tries to kick dirt over the poo
[2:03]* Furball cleans himself
[2:03]* Socks licks his bum#
[2:03]* Paul goes to buy some unburnt clothes
[2:03]* Socks goes inside
[2:03]* Socks sleeps
[2:04]* Furball scampers over Sock's back
[2:04]* Socks sleeps
[2:04]* Socks dreams
[2:04]* Paul goes to Death's place
[2:04]* Socks dreams of fish
[2:04]* Furball trips over the alarm clock
[2:04]* Death gets another bean bag
[2:04]* Socks dreams of fish and hampsters
[2:04]* Furball pinches Death's beanbag for himself
[2:04]* Socks dreams of hampsters and other cats
[2:04]* Socks dreams of hampsters
[2:05]* Paul bangs loudly on Death's door
[2:05]* Death wonders what happened to furballs original bean bag.
[2:05]<Paul> :)
[2:05]* Death opens the door to Paul
[2:05]* Furball didn't have one
[2:05]<Death> Yes?
[2:05]* Socks dreams of the taste of hampsters
[2:05]* Paul wants to meet Death
[2:05]* Death thinks he got another one when furball headed over.
[2:05]* Socks dreams of the taste of Furball
[2:05]* Furball bites Sock's ear
[2:06]<Death> Did you want something (says Death to the figure on the doorstep)
[2:06]* Socks wakes up
[2:06]* Paul wants to know where his pets went
[2:06]* Socks looks around him
[2:06]* Furball scampers away and hides behiund Paul's leg
[2:06]<Paul> me picks up Furball
[2:06]* Socks rubs his head against Paul's leg
[2:06]* Socks mews
[2:06]* Furball looks down at Socks
[2:06]* Socks rubs his head against Paul's leg
[2:06]* Death wonders why he has to use telepathy to understand Paul rather than him just talking
[2:06]* Paul picks up Socks too
[2:07]<Death> Are these your pets?
[2:07]<Paul> Erm... * Paul wants to know where his pets went
[2:07]<Paul> Yes
[2:07]* Socks mews
[2:07]* Paul takes his pets back
[2:07]* Socks doesn't like being carried
[2:07]* Socks scratches
[2:07]<Death> Well, this one (he says indicating socks) was left in the rain
[2:07]* Furball scowls at Socks
[2:07]* Socks bites
[2:07]* Socks struggles
[2:07]* Socks bites
[2:07]* Socks scratches
[2:07]* Socks scratches
[2:07]<Paul> No, he ran away when I opened the door
[2:07]*** Satan sets mode: +b *!*sjg@*.ac.uk
[2:07]* Socks scratches
[2:07]*** You were kicked by Satan (.CTCP. flooder.)
*** Attempting to rejoin...
Session Close: Wed May 13 02:07:48 1998
Session Start: Wed May 13 02:08:05 1998
[2:08]*** Now talking in #keble
[2:08]*** Topic is 'NP: Sleeper - Atomic.'
[2:08]*** Set by Satan on Tue May 12 23:31:48
#keble created on Tue Apr 21 11:49:29
[2:08]*** Satan was kicked by Death (Death.)
[2:08]*** Satan (nobody@orange.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:08]*** God sets mode: +o Satan
[2:08]* Furball wonders how come Socks just vanished into thin air
[2:08]*** Death sets mode: -o Satan
[2:08]* Paul does too
[2:08]<Death> That's better
[2:08]* Socks does too
[2:08]* Paul puts Socks down
[2:08]<Death> Transdimensional interference from that UFO
[2:08]* Furball looks down at Socks
[2:08]* Socks has lost all the commands that he had in his buffer
[2:08]<Death> :)
[2:08]* Furball suspected that too :-)
[2:09]* Furball is glad
[2:09]*** Spot-subs (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has left #keble
[2:09]* Socks mews
[2:09]* Socks purrs
[2:09]* Furball moos
[2:09]*** An_alien (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:09]* Socks rubs his head against Paul's leg
[2:09]* Furball is an unusual hamster
[2:09]<An_alien> Take me to your leader.
[2:09]<Paul> No
[2:09]<Paul> HTH HAND
[2:09]* Socks rubs his head against An_Alien's leg
[2:09]* Socks purrs
[2:09]* An_alien looks at the cat.
[2:09]*** An_alien was kicked by Paul (Go back to mars! :-) .)
[2:09]*** An_alien (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:10]* twoflower notices some pops towards the end of I think I'm paradoid
[2:10]<twoflower> IM paranoid
[2:10]<An_alien> Ah. Intelligent life.
[2:10]* Furball hides in Paul's pocket
[2:10]<An_alien> Take me to your leader.
[2:10]* Socks rubs his head against An_Alien's leg
[2:10]* An_alien says to Socks
[2:10]* Paul has no leader. He is his own man.
[2:10]<Paul> :)
[2:10]* Socks purrs
[2:10]* Socks mews
[2:10]* An_alien says to the cat again "Take me to your leader"
[2:10]* Paul stands in between Socks and the Alien
[2:10]* Socks bites twoflowerd's ankle
[2:10]* Socks bites twoflower's ankle
[2:10]* Socks bites Paul's ankle
[2:11]* Furball peeps out at twoflower
[2:11]* An_alien wishes it had got further in the simple guide to speaking english when conquering the galaxy
[2:11]* Paul tells Socks off
[2:11]* Socks scrabbles up Paul's leg
[2:11]* Paul jumps
[2:11]* Socks falls off
[2:11]* twoflower notices that the pops are in the decoding
[2:11]* God arrives and says "I am their leader. WTF do you want?"
[2:11]<An_alien> Take me to your egg salesman.
[2:11]* Furball jumps out of Paul's pocket and runs over to twoflower
[2:11]<An_alien> Ah, you are their leader
[2:12]<God> I am
[2:12]* Socks chases Furball
[2:12]* Paul lol
[2:12]<An_alien> If you would like to sign here (it says holding out a clipboard.
[2:12]<God> And if I wouldn't?
[2:12]* Furball runs up twoflower's leg
[2:12]<twoflower> ouch
[2:12]* Socks bites twoflower's ankle
[2:12]<An_alien> Then I can't deliver your parcel.
[2:12]* Socks scrabbles up twoflower's leg
[2:12]<God> And what would be in said parcel?
[2:12]<An_alien> (the alien reads out of page 19 of the Alien english translator
[2:12]<Paul> me pulls socks off of twoflower by the scruff of his neck
[2:13]* An_alien flicks through the book again...
[2:13]* Socks pees all over Paul
[2:13]* God gets impatient
[2:13]<An_alien> I am only a haddock.
[2:13]* Socks pees all over God
[2:13]<An_alien> No.
[2:13]* twoflower is working, furry thinks should be kept away, as should computers
[2:13]* Paul is wearing a coat now - he's not silly
[2:13]<An_alien> I am only a aubergine
[2:13]<An_alien> No.
[2:13]<An_alien> I am only the french prime minister.
[2:13]<An_alien> no.
[2:13]* Furball sticks his tongue out at twoflower :-)
[2:13]<An_alien> Ah ha
[2:13]* Socks mews
[2:13]* Socks sulks
[2:13]<An_alien> I am only the delivery man.
[2:13]* Furball runs up An_Alien's leg
[2:13]* God fires a lightning bolt at socks
[2:13]* Socks yelps
[2:13]* Socks sulks
[2:14]* An_alien picks up furball and looks at it interestedly.
[2:14]* Furball looks back interesatedly
[2:14]<An_alien> Is this lunch (he says after flicking through his book again)
[2:14]<God> I don't care if you're the delivery man or the fucking prime minister. Piss off
[2:14]* Furball tells An_Alien "No"
[2:14]<An_alien> I must deliver your parcel though.
[2:14]<An_alien> It is waiting to be beamed down.
[2:14]* Socks h ops on one leg
[2:14]*** God sets mode: +o Socks
[2:14]<God> Who sent you?
[2:15]<An_alien> I work for the company
[2:15]* Furball thought that was a feeble way of getting ops, eh
[2:15]* Socks thinks #keble is getting very silly tonight
[2:15]* Furball meant of getting ops , eh :)
[2:15]*** God sets mode: +o Furball
[2:15]* Socks notices the comma after ops
[2:15]<God> Which sodding company
[2:15]<God> ?
[2:15]<twoflower> the one giving out ops ?
[2:15]* Socks thinks God is being grumpy
[2:15]<An_alien> They would translate into your language as (Really good and fast shipping of boxes and things to people you want to get them to)
[2:15]* Socks thinks Grumpy is being Grumpy
[2:15]* Furball wibbles
[2:16]* Furball widdles on An_Alien
[2:16]* Death watches interestedly
[2:16]* Socks notices Death
[2:16]<An_alien> Ah. Nutrients.
[2:16]* An_alien absorbs Furballs widdle.
[2:16]* Paul joins Death and also looks interestedly at the motley crew
[2:16]* Socks rubs his head against Death's leg
[2:16]* Death absently strokes Socks.
[2:16]*** Rincewind (~ridcully@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:16]* Furball looks jealously
[2:16]* Socks thinks he would like to own Death
[2:17]* Furball scampers over to paul attention-seekingly
[2:17]* God launches a lightning bolt at An_alien
[2:17]*** An_alien is now known as The_Alien
[2:17]* Socks adopts Death
[2:17]* Paul strokes Furball
[2:17]* Socks purrs
[2:17]* Furball wibbles
[2:17]* Furball widdles on Paul
[2:17]* The_Alien looks unfazed as the bolt is absorbed in a flash a foot away from him
[2:17]<The_Alien> Please sign
[2:17]* Paul is still wearing a coat, though
[2:17]* Furball is glad
[2:18]* God will not sign
[2:18]* Socks wanders in and out of Deaths legs
[2:18]* Furball wants God to sign
[2:18]* Death is pleased to be adopted.
[2:18]<The_Alien> Why won't you sign (says the alien getting the hang of english)
[2:18]* Socks wanders in and out of Deaths legs
[2:18]*** Furball changes topic to 'RPG-IRC .'
[2:18]<God> Becasue I don't want a sodding parcel
[2:18]* Paul chuckles
[2:18]* Socks giggles and wonders if TFM will join us
[2:18]* Furball thinks God does
[2:18]* Rincewind ops 1
[2:18]*** God sets mode: +o Rincewind
[2:18]* Furball 's mind is being controlled by An-Alien
[2:19]* The_Alien looks puzzled for a moment
[2:19]* Furball demands that God signs the form
[2:19]* Socks is glad that he is only one character
[2:19]<The_Alien> But everybody likes getting parcels
[2:19]* God gives Furball a long hard stare
[2:19]* Furball snarls evilly at God
[2:19]<God> No they don't
[2:19]<Rincewind> What is Furball's real name, paul :)
[2:19]* Death turns to socks and says "Why do you think I'm only watching?"
[2:19]*** Evan (sjg@purple.stcatz.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:19]* Paul has no idea ;-)
[2:19]<Rincewind> depends what's in them surey
[2:20]<Rincewind> IM surely
[2:20]* God has never seen a hamster snarl
[2:20]* The_Alien looks more puzzled
[2:20]* Paul runs away from the transformed Furball
[2:20]<The_Alien> But...
[2:20]* Socks doesn't know what Death is talking about
[2:20]<The_Alien> ...everybody like getting parcels
[2:20]* Furball runs after God
[2:20]* Death thought it was obviously the one character comment
[2:20]<God> I'm the exception that proves the rule
[2:20]* Socks wanders in and out of Deaths legs
[2:21]* The_Alien turns to the rest
[2:21]* Paul sees death trip up on Socks
[2:21]<The_Alien> Take me to your second in command.
[2:21]* Socks pisses himself laughing
[2:21]* Furball falls out of An_Alien's control
[2:21]<Death> *%&$£$@ %^$* £$%*$^ £$%^£((@£$ @~@~£ $%£
[2:21]*** Jesus (~mike@oakley.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:21]<The_Alien> Ah. Jesus
[2:21]* Socks pisses himself laughing even more
[2:21]<Jesus> I am their second in command
[2:21]<The_Alien> Will you sign this please.
[2:22]<Jesus> Oh, alright.
[2:22]* Jesus signs
[2:22]<The_Alien> Thank you
[2:22]* Furball bites Jesus' hand
[2:22]* The_Alien shimmers and disappears and in his place appears a parcel...
[2:22]* Paul faints
[2:22]*** The_Alien is now known as The_Parce
[2:22]* Socks adds "Take me to your second in command" to his sig files
[2:22]*** The_Parce is now known as Parcel
[2:22]* Jesus kicks furball accross the room
[2:22]* Furball bounces back and bites his hand again
[2:22]* Socks notices he is hungry
[2:22]* Death wonders how long before he has to decide what is in the parcel (ooc)
[2:22]* Paul wakes up, a bit dizzy
[2:22]* Socks mews
[2:22]* Socks notices he is hungry
[2:22]* Socks mews
[2:23]* Furball suspects there is a time travel machine in there
[2:23]* Socks mews
[2:23]* Jesus tells God to open the parcel
[2:23]* Socks mews
[2:23]* Furball barks
[2:23]* Furball is a strange hamster, remember?
[2:23]* Socks mews
[2:23]* Parcel rattles a bit
[2:23]<God> You open it you sonofabitch. It's your fault we got it
[2:23]*** Alastair (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:23]* Furball bites the string on the parcel
[2:23]*** Alastair (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has left #keble
[2:23]<Socks> Shirly, sonofavirgin
[2:24]* Paul agrees
[2:24]*** Holyghost (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:24]<God> Yeah.... didn't think of that
[2:24]* Socks mews
[2:24]* Socks notices he is hungry
[2:24]* Socks mews
[2:24]* Furball baas
[2:24]* Socks notices Furball
[2:24]* Socks notices he is hungry
[2:24]* Holyghost wonders what the other two are arguing about.
[2:24]* Jesus gives socks a fish
[2:24]* Furball turns into a multi-cattle hybrid
[2:24]*** Furball is now known as Animal
[2:24]* Animal barks
[2:24]* Socks purrs
[2:24]* Animal eee-orrs
[2:25]* Animal snorts at Socks
[2:25]* Parcel rattles a bit more
[2:25]* Animal kicks Parcel
[2:25]* Jesus throws Parcel at Holyghost
[2:25]* Animal slithers over Parcel
[2:25]* Parcel falls on its side and the top opens slightly
[2:25]* Socks leaves IRC for a bit cos he really needs the toilet
[2:25]* Parcel seems to be glowing a bit inside.
[2:25]* Animal farts and it blows open
[2:25]* Jesus runs away
[2:26]* Paul holds his noser
[2:26]* Parcel opens fully to reveal a glowing ball that floats 6 inches off the ground.
[2:26]* God faints
[2:26]* Animal farts some more
[2:26]* Paul faints too
[2:26]*** Parcel is now known as ball
[2:26]* Animal looks in the Ball
[2:26]*** ball is now known as The_ball
[2:27]*** Animal is now known as Beanz
[2:27]* The_ball seems to be made of a thousand different coloured lights swirling around in the ball
[2:27]* Beanz looks interestedly at the ball
[2:27]<Holyghost> What does it do?
[2:27]* God comes round
[2:27]* Beanz farts
[2:27]<Holyghost> God, any idea
[2:27]* God pokes The_ball experimentally
[2:27]* Paul hands God a gas-mas
[2:27]<Paul> k
[2:27]<Socks> !drink Beanz
[2:27]* Grumpy hands Beanz a {job contract}
[2:28]* God thanks paul
[2:28]<Paul> s OK
[2:28]* The_ball suddenly explodes as God touches it. Everybody's senses are blinded and when it clears there is a small minibus sitting in its blace
[2:28]*** The_ball is now known as minibus
[2:28]<Holyghost> What the fuck did you do god?
[2:28]<Holyghost> That could have been valuable
[2:28]* Beanz climbs into the minibus
[2:28]<Death> I don't think it was anything he did
[2:28]* Beanz farts and stinks out the minibus
[2:28]* minibus doesn't seem to have any way of steering
[2:29]<God> It ain't my fucking fault the bloody thing wanted to be a sodding bus
[2:29]* minibus does however have a good air conditioning system.
[2:29]<Paul> * Paul wants to know where his pets went
[2:29]<Paul> Oops
[2:29]* Paul doesn't really :)
[2:29]* Beanz glares at Paul
[2:29]* minibus has a small dashboard at the front and each of the seats seems to have the name of somebody present on it...
[2:29]<Holyghost> Are you sure this wasn't you god?
[2:29]* God climbs into the minibus and finds his seat
[2:30]<Holyghost> Oh well...
[2:30]<God> Nothing to do with me
[2:30]*** Beanz is now known as Driver
[2:30]* Holyghost follows and sits down.
[2:30]* Driver starts the engine
[2:30]* minibus has no way to start an engine
[2:30]<Paul> me runs for the bus
[2:30]* Jesus comes back
[2:30]* Death gets aboard too and brings those who haven't yet.
[2:30]* Socks infors Paul that he is doing the washing up (again) cos all this Trinity/minibus stuff is too bizarre
[2:30]<Paul> me push-starts the minibus
[2:30]* Paul thanks Socks cordially
[2:30]<Socks> IM informs
[2:31]* minibus starts humming quietly once the last person who is coming is aboard.
[2:31]<Death> I guess we just wait...
[2:31]* Driver steers the minibus using buttons on the dashboard
[2:31]* Jesus is bored
[2:31]* Driver farts
[2:31]<God> Where are we going Driver
[2:31]* Driver ate Beanz :)
[2:31]* Driver isn't sure
[2:31]* Driver wants a map
[2:31]* minibus jerks around wildly and lightning flashes around the outside of the bus. when people can see they find they are somewhere very different
[2:32]*** Driver is now known as Borg
[2:32]<Holyghost> Shit, what is this place?
[2:32]* Borg greets the people on the bus
[2:32]<Death> Hello
[2:32]<God> Hi
[2:32]* Borg shakes Death by the earlobe
[2:32]* Holyghost looks in awe at the sights around him.
[2:32]* Death doesn't have an earlobe.
[2:32]<God> I don't friggin' know ghostie
[2:32]* Borg floats over to holyghost
[2:32]* Death is a skellington
[2:33]* Borg peers through holyghost
[2:33]* Paul trembles
[2:33]<Holyghost> For god's sake lighten up
[2:33]* Jesus wishes running away was an option
[2:33]* Death thinks we should explore.
[2:33]* Borg welcomes Jesus warmly
[2:33]* Borg leads the way
[2:33]<Death> What can you see borg?
[2:33]* God follows
[2:33]* Holyghost follows too.
[2:34]* Borg sees a place where grsavity is reversed
[2:34]<Paul> me floats
[2:34]<Death> I knew it.
[2:34]<Death> We're in the future
[2:34]* Jesus stands on his head
[2:34]* Socks thinks bubbles are an important part of washing up
[2:34]* Holyghost stands on Jesus' head too
[2:34]* Borg looks at the time module on his finger
[2:34]* Socks likes bubbles
[2:34]<Borg> The year is 4003
[2:34]<Holyghost> God damnit
[2:34]<God> What?
[2:34]* minibus stops whirring and humming
[2:35]<God> Damn what??
[2:35]<Holyghost> Damnit
[2:35]* Borg is hungry
[2:35]* Borg eats rocks
[2:35]<Paul> me looks for something more edible
[2:35]* God damns Holyghost for want of anything better to damn
[2:35]* Death thinks we should try and work out why we were bought here.
[2:35]* Borg offers Paul a rock
[2:35]<Holyghost> Damnit Beavis
[2:35]* Paul declines politely
[2:35]<Holyghost> I mean god
[2:35]* Rincewind grins gleefully
[2:36]* Borg didn't rincewind was here
[2:36]<Death> Hi rince
[2:36]* God discovers painfully that lightning bolts now go from destination to source
[2:36]<Borg> IM realise rince...
[2:36]<Death> I bought him aboard to avoid continuity problems.
[2:36]* God glares at Holyghost
[2:36]<Holyghost> Don't look at me. I didn't know.
[2:36]* Borg shakes rincewind by the earlobe
[2:36]<Jesus> I wanna go home
[2:36]<Rincewind> someone has posted a reply to Dr John saying "this post is off topic: go and read the FAQs". Hmmmm, taste of his own medicine I think....
[2:36]* Borg shakes Jesus by the earlobe
[2:37]<Holyghost> don't be a wuss jesus
[2:37]* Jesus wimpers
[2:37]* Paul chuckles
[2:37]* Jesus cries
[2:37]<Holyghost> Just go sit in the bus or something if you don't want to come.
[2:37]* Death comforts Jesus
[2:37]* Borg welcomes Jesus
[2:37]* Jesus stops crying
[2:37]* Borg hands Jesus a tissue
[2:38]* Jesus thanks Borg
[2:38]* minibus opens his doors to let Jesus come in to safety.
[2:38]* Jesus goes in, curls up in the corner and goes to sleep
[2:38]* Borg jumps onto this strange past-time minibus
[2:38]<Death> (Out of character: this is being logged by somebody isn't it? :))
[2:38]<Socks> Me
[2:39]<God> Good
[2:39]* minibus throws borg off and borg finds himself unable to approach within 30 paces
[2:39]* Borg cries
[2:39]<Borg> !tissue
[2:39]* Grumpy hands Borg a tissue
[2:39]<Death> Lets go look in that building over there
[2:39]* Borg blows his ear
[2:40]<Holyghost> .me whispers to the others "I think there's something wrong with Borg. He ain't normal"
[2:40]<Paul> me is glad he created "Rover"
[2:40]<Paul> YKWIM
[2:40]* Death heads to the building
[2:40]* Borg feels alienated :)
[2:40]* God gives Holyghost a cold stare and mutters sommat about not judging people be appearances etc
[2:41]<Holyghost> Your a fine one to talk.
[2:41]* Borg puts on a mask
[2:41]<God> Well fuck you
[2:41]<Holyghost> How many holy wars have you started for a laugh?
[2:41]* Borg puts on a wig
[2:41]* Paul lol
[2:41]<God> That's different
[2:41]<Holyghost> Yeah?
[2:41]<Holyghost> You just turned to me and said "Fancy a game of soldiers"
[2:41]<God> I'm allowed to. I make up all the sodding rules
[2:41]<Holyghost> Fucking soldiers. That's all it is to you.
[2:41]<God> And?
[2:42]<Holyghost> And you got pissed off with Jesus and sent him to earth to get fucked over by all comers.
[2:42]<Holyghost> You grassed his position to Satan just so he could tempt him.
[2:42]<Holyghost> Then ?you/ got him crucified.
[2:42]<God> You gotto admit that was fun to watch though
[2:42]<Holyghost> Well, yeah.
[2:42]* Borg decides to transform into Satan
[2:42]<Holyghost> But that's not the point
[2:42]<Holyghost> You're being hypocritical
[2:42]<God> So what is the point?
[2:42]<God> I'm not.
[2:42]* Rincewind is tired
[2:43]<Holyghost> You sodding are.
[2:43]<God> I fucking ain't
[2:43]* minibus welcomes Rincewind to the minibus too.
[2:43]*** Borg is now known as SatanII
[2:43]<Holyghost> You bloody well are and you know it you stubborn git.
[2:43]<SatanII> MUHAHAHAHAAAA
[2:43]* Rincewind is not in the minibus.
[2:43]* SatanII zaps God's arse
[2:43]* Rincewind does not do RPG
[2:43]<God> I fucking ain't and it you don't shut the fuck up I'll send you to earth
[2:43]* Paul ducks
[2:43]*** Rincewind was kicked by Death (Join in you boring git.)
[2:43]*** Rincewind (~ridcully@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:44]* God dodges and zaps SatanII
[2:44]<Holyghost> I'm the fucking holy ghost.
[2:44]<Holyghost> I'm already there you twast
[2:44]* SatanII dies
[2:44]* Rincewind ops 1
[2:44]*** God sets mode: +o Rincewind
[2:44]<God> Shit
[2:44]* SatanII regenerates
[2:44]*** Death was kicked by Rincewind (no.)
[2:44]*** Death (chris@vorpal.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:44]* SatanII zaps rincewind
[2:44]<God> Well.... I'll give you a human form then
[2:44]* Death thinks that Rincewind is suffering from delusions of reality.
[2:44]<Holyghost> You wouldn't dare.
[2:45]<God> I fucking would
[2:45]* Rincewind thinks Rincewind might go to bed
[2:45]* Holyghost looks worried
[2:45]* SatanII zaps rincewind's bed
[2:45]<Holyghost> Errrrmmm... alright
[2:45]<God> Muahahahahahaha
[2:45]<Holyghost> What were we talking about anyway?
[2:45]* Paul hotwires the minibus
[2:45]<Holyghost> Oh yeah, borg?
[2:45]* minibus has no wires.
[2:45]<God> What?
[2:45]* SatanII zaps one of the minibus's tyres
[2:46]* Paul screeches to a halt
[2:46]* minibus s tires have no visible difference
[2:46]* SatanII zaps minibus
[2:46]* God zaps SatanII
[2:46]* SatanII zaps SatanII
[2:46]* minibus wonders when people will realise that the wheels don't work, the engine is not there and that it has only one button to control it.
[2:46]* SatanII dies twice
[2:46]<God> Fucking imposter
[2:46]*** SatanII is now known as GodII
[2:47]<GodII> OI! God!
[2:47]<Holyghost> Fuck off GodII
[2:47]* GodII wants to know why God has stolen his name
[2:47]<Holyghost> Your not real and you know it.
[2:47]<God> For once, Holyghost isn't talking crap
[2:47]* GodII knows God is the imposter, since he can't spell "you're," and God is perfect
[2:47]<God> Piss off now or your arse will be severely kicked
[2:48]<Holyghost> I don't mind taking shit from you God because you have a God-given role.... errr you have a....
[2:48]*** GodII was kicked by Socks (I can't cope with this.)
[2:48]*** GodII (~paul@canna.keble.ox.ac.uk) has joined #keble
[2:48]*** GodII is now known as Bouncer
[2:48]<Holyghost> Its the dog from Neighbours now.
[2:48]* Bouncer is the Neighbours dog
[2:48]<Bouncer> :)
[2:48]* God is going to bed soon
[2:48]* Holyghost throws a frisby for bouncer
[2:48]* Paul is too
[2:49]* God zaps the frisby in midair
[2:49]* Bouncer is hit on the temple by the frisbee and faints
[2:49]* Holyghost thinks that we should all get in the minibus and let god use his divine powers to get us home.
[2:49]* God agrees
[2:49]* God gets in
[2:49]* Death gets in the minibus
[2:49]* Holyghost gets in
[2:49]* Bouncer barks excitedly at the idea
[2:49]* Bouncer gets in
[2:49]* Paul gets in
[2:49]* God uses his divine powers
[2:49]* Death watches everybody get in and tread on Jesus's toes as they go pst.
[2:49]* minibus shimmers and shakes briefly
[2:49]<Death> This looks familiar
[2:49]* Bouncer yaps
[2:49]* God kicks Jesus up the arse
[2:50]<Death> We're home
[2:50]* Paul is glad
[2:50]<Bouncer> me is tired
[2:50]* God goes to bed
[2:50]* Bouncer is tired, IM
[2:50]* Death gets out and hopes that it isn't the corner "back too far into dinosaurs and stuff" ending.
[2:50]* Paul does too
[2:50]* Jesus does too
[2:50]*** Jesus has quit IRC (Leaving.)
[2:50]*** Paul has quit IRC (Leaving.)
[2:50]* Holyghost goes back to heaven and earth and everywhere
[2:50]*** Bouncer is now known as Paul
[2:50]*** Holyghost has quit IRC (Leaving.)

Back to the #keble quotes page

Back to the index